Tuesday, 20 November 2012

What a year did

It's odd to me, that this time last year, i was coming in to my new place, nothing was in it, just me, yet it made me smile. In one way or another, it has done every day i've had it.

Let me take you back to over a year ago.

I was back living with my mother, we were getting on each others nerves because when she wanted an early night, i wanted to have friends around for drinks, when i wanted party's, she wanted to have a quiet night in etc etc etc.

I'd been applying for my own place for something like 9 months through the council's bidding system. I was pretty beaten down by it and thinking of giving up on the idea of me ever being able to have a place of my own.

All of a sudden, on the website, there was a surge one week of bedsit's and 1 bedroom flats. I applied for as many as i could (3 i think was the limit). Thinking that i wouldn't hear back from any of them, on the sunday night, before bidding closed on the tuesday, i was still first in the bidding line for a flat.... wtf?

On the tuesday, i received a phone call from an unknown number. It was the council. Calling to congradulate me, i'd won the bid and they'd love to show me the flat. I think it was on the thursday me and my mother came down to see the flat. This is what we found....

The "Round the corner" bit of the flat.

The other part to the living room.

Kitchen had undergone a refit with a new kitchen sink, cubards, plumbing, electrics etc. Only thing they'd not done was the walls.

As you can tell, that wallpaper was going to have to come off.

A little hidden closet stood at the end of the kitchen, loads of pipes and such, but loads of space in there for storage etc...

I couldn't fit the whole of the bedroom into one picture, but here's most of it....

Bathroom, again, not up to much, but all new plumbing, bathtub, sink, toilet etc...

So after seeing it, infact, while still in the flat, we set up a meeting for me to go and sign up for it to become mine.

On 11.11.11 i signed the contract and got the keys, the place was mine.

As soon as i left the office, i walked up to the flat to let myself in and take a walk around. Nothing could take the smile off my face for the rest of the day. I think i spent the rest of the night with thought's spinning in my head about what i could do with the place, where i would place things.... I was just too happy, my first ever place alone!

Over the next few weeks, me and literally, everyone i knew, all picked up tools and they helped me to paint it into a masterpeice.

Once we had the place painted, it was then amazing to me at how many people got in touch, through all sorts of ways, saying "Oh i've got _____ you can have". Here's just some of the things we did to decorate at first. Keep in mind, most of these were free....

Ok granted, Tilly wasn't donated to me, but as you can see, she supervised the whole decoration and move in process.
I don't think these people may ever be able to understand just how greatful i really am to them.
I didn't have all the money in the world to make this move in as easy as others made it. Without them offering me help when i needed it and items when they were going spare, the flat certainly wouldn't be what it is today.
After a while, i moved in, which was great! Finally, a place of my own!
It still wasn't right though, the floors were bare. I faced two options at this time (and sometimes during some very heated debates, i knew what i wanted). Option one was to sand the floors right down and then varnish them, or, carpet them.
Guess which option i chose?

That's right, i wanted carpets and i think i chose wisely!
So a whole year on and why do i still love it?
It for me, is my lifestyle, sometimes un-tidy but it's able to offer me what i need sometimes which is an escape from the world. If i want to have people around, i can open the door, if not, then i can do my own thing and really get to know myself.
I don't feel scared or unsafe, i don't get lonely nor do i wish things had been different in the moving in.
So, going from a shell, i think this place is pretty good up to now. A year on and yes, theres still things that im missing and things that keep changing, but for now, it is mine. My home. Just a year older.


Sunday, 18 November 2012

We got the marriage crazy's!

Above is an image that some of you are going to be looking at and thinking "Why on earth has he posted that?"

Truth of the matter is, back in the 1960's, black people were pushing for equality, they wanted to be treated exactly the same, that's what is shown on the left. On the right, you can see that the LGBT community are currently calling for marriage equality, in a number of places now too. This is called, marriage equality.

Why do i compare the two?

Back when black people were kept apart from white people, based purley on the colour of their skin (Let's not forget, they can't choose the colour of their skin) it of course meant that some people were going to call for equality, at one point or another. The amount of hate which these people recieved was un-believeable. For year's and even to this day (by some crazy people), people with a skin colour other than white, can still find themselves told that "god" does not like them, basically.

And there's the key to this, god. You remember that guy who said to love thy neighbour as thyself, who forgives people of their sin, who... in truth, couldn't care less what you look like or what you do, just as long as you follow the ten commandments then you're good to go. Well, according to his crazy's, they think it does matter, all of it, and how you will be condemmed to hell if you dare to do something that said person does not like.

But if you want to believe in heaven and hell, then you also have to believe in a talking snake actually existing too, so... yeah think about that.

But, back to the point here....

You see, equality was almost gotten by the black community, it of course, will never be at 100% because there's always going to be those few people who treat other's differently because of the colour of their skin.

Why do i mention this at all, i hear you cry? (Well, i don't, im not one of those crazy's).

Well, there's a massive similarity in between the two movements. Back when the black community started pushing for equality, is around about the same time as the LGBT community started pushing for equality too, although we were kind of late with our major push. These days though we push forward for marriage equality, we are told that god, does not want marriage re-defined, that he does not approve of gay people, that we're doomed to burn in hell etc etc etc.

You know, next time you hear a person saying that sort of thing, just think in your head....

Replace the words "gay rights" with "black rights" and "gays" with "blacks". All of sudden you can be transported back to the same arguments all those years ago. It's the same thing being said over and over again, yet what happens? Religion's and people get proven wrong. It was quoted by people that should black people be given the same rights as white people, that the world would end... has it? NO! Will it? NO!!!!

Exactly the same is said these days, how the world is going to end because of gay people, how marriage equality right's in new york, actually cause hurricane sandy.... yes! did you know that? Us gays, we caused that? EXACTLY, of course we did it, so bow down to our powerfulness, or were sending a tornado to your house.... or something...

Look, i know that was alot of text but i'm getting close to the point of this.... just have a watch of this video below....

Very cleaverly wrote! I LOVE this speech...

But in truth, he was a minority of speakers at this event.

What was happening? Well, a bill was being put forward to say that gay people shouldn't be refused employment because of their sexuality. This wasn't actually do with marriage equality, but it still shows you just how close the hatred is from outsiders.

So who are the marriage crazy's i reffer to?

Well, for a while now, i've been able to sit and watch, as america battles out the marriage equality debate. Watching the LGBT and supporters side speak of how it isn't right to be treating others differently, to the other side which seem to use either religion or nature as an argument that it's perfectly find to treat others differently, deny them rights etc.

Marriage equality is now something that is going through the UK's houses of parliment (about time). But when it comes to politics, the UK is rarely the ones to have crazy's, when it comes to equality. Sure there's hatefilled groups which can't stand the fact that theres immigration, or people with different skin colours etc, but they don't have alot of support tbh...

However, marriage equality is bringing people out of their shells! The uk government infact, had their first anti-marriage equality rally held outside one of their events.... Wait, thats worded wrong, the government didn't organise it.... But, it seems this is going to be one topic which is going to split the country.

Here's the two sides and what they're saying and why....

Ok so, the LGBT community and it's supporters call for marriage equality. That is for people of the same sex to be able to marry, should they want to.

  • Ensure that LGBT couples can marry and have equal protection under the law, same as heterosexual married couples.
  • Ensure that civil partnerships are defined as such and is not confused with marriage equality.
  • Signal the end of the world.
  • Force places of worship to change their faith in order to accom same-sex couples who want to be married.
  • Allow human beings to marry animals.
  • Promote pedophillia.
  • End religion.
  • Re-define marriage.
  • Force people to change their points of view on the LGBT community
  • Change the text of books of worship.
  • Push for places of worship to be closed down.
All of the "Does not" part, is in response to just some of the arguments against marriage equality.

So, why am i happy about seeing the marriage crazy's?

Well, as un-popular as the idea of two people getting married might be to others, it's equality. People who argue against equality are always the one's stood on the wrong side of the argument, as is proven world over, equality win's, eventually.

To see the marriage crazy's out, with their weird and wonderful excuses against marriage equality, mean's they feel under threat. When they feel under threat, it signal's that they're not on the popular side as much, so try to get people to think the same way that they do, which mean's getting themselves out there at these rally's and talking to others, making their own voice heard etc.

I on the other hand, know that we will have marriage equality soon in this country. Should it even go to a public vote (It won't, but if it did) recent survey's show that marriage equality has more people for it, than against it.... yey!

Finally, i'd just like to point out something here, for those who didn't notice this....

Remember a while back, that guy called mitt romney?

Well, he was another one of the opinion, that marriage is defined as being between 1 man and 1 woman. It's not, but he thought it was. Now, his argument against it was that it would re-define marriage.... again, it wouldn't.

But he wanted to change the constitution of america, to say that marriage is between 1 man and 1 woman. So ask yourself, who really wanted to make the change there?

If you can't make up your mind as to where you stand on the marriage equality issue, then take a look at the depfox channel on youtube. They're a family, which hold onto your hats here.... Are a gay married couple (Dammit lost my hat) AND have adopted kids too (Dammit, now my toupee flew off too).

There's a post coming on christmas day, on this blog, which include some of the depfox channel video's of them celebrating christmas. But let me show you one of their other video's to start you off and remember, if you want to know about a gay family, what they look like, what they do as a family etc, then look at the rest of the video's on this channel.

Finally, there's something to be said :O shocking right?

Well, just remember, if someone ever turns around to you and says that you can't do something, because of your sex, sexuality, race, appearance etc and their excuse is "that's the way it is" don't believe it.  You can make change happen.

Thursday, 8 November 2012

Homophobic attacks

See, this is a topic that even for me has a fine line about what is acceptable and what isn't, lesser the fact i could well, and will, piss off a number of people in the LGBT community by saying this, but when have i ever been one to care about who gets it told straight?

Below, is a video of an apparent homophobic attack, i invite you to watch what happens in the video and make up your own mind. Pay close attention to what happens, verbally AND body language....

Think it's shocking right?

To a point, you'd be right, but here is where i draw the line.... Let's go through my point's here.


Train Guard - If i remember rightly, this train service is carried out by First trains. During staff training they do include alot about what to do with customers confronting each other etc, However, some of the slur's used on both sides, should have been picked up on and condemmed by the guard himself. While you may think that the days are long gone of a train stopping in the middle of no where to throw someone off, you'd be shocked that they can remove you from a train at any time, any where.... Only the bad press it would generate means that companies no longer do this.

However, he didn't manage the situation at all, he didn't do anything other than ask the apparent victims to move away, which yes, they could move which they refused to do so, but we'll go onto that later. What would i have done if i was him? The service could easily make an unshed'd stop, police called and involved to sort this situation out. While yes it would add a delay onto the service, it would stop the threats of violence which can be heard towards the end of the video.

The Victims - This is why i said look at the body language. Sure, the man might well have been saying things, but when has homophobia ever been stopped by leaning over a train seat shouting the odd's? Never, that's when. What would i have done? Well, i'll go more into this later on, but i would have ignored him.... that's right, why take him on? His mind will not be changed by words, but by action's, what he can see, will change his mind if his mind is to ever be changed.

Ok, so what else?

Well, not so much a failure or a win, but here's my view on the situation....

In the video's description, they mention that this has been carrying on since the journey started at it's platform in Blackpool. Now, WHY would you go and sit near someone like that if they have been giving you any sort of hate? Surely if this started on the platform, then you could easily go and sit somewhere else and not near him.

Secondly, is this a homophobic attack? Because the only attack i see is a man trying to read his paper, being bugged by a screaming queen leaning over a train seat giving him abuse back. I honestly do believe that this man was provoked into such an attack by people who were desperate for youtube video hits and abit of drama.

I know, you must be thinking that im crazy, as a gay man, saying that, but im honestly not. Read this below....

"A TEENAGER was left with two broken ribs in what police suspect was a homophobic attack. Plymouth UK.

The 19-year-old student has told police he was near the Dog and Duck public house in Mutley Plain at around 3.10am on October 6 when he heard a man shouting "fag" and "batty boy" just before he was struck violently around the head.

One of the pair was understood to have shouted out: "We live he...
re, we know people" as they continued their assault.

Det Con Louise Steele, of the Plymouth Diverse Communities Team said "We know there were around 15 other people nearby at the time and at one stage a woman and a man raced over to help protect the victim from this assault."
"We believe one of the suspects even went on to attack another person further up the street immediately after this incident."

Police have released CCTV stills of two men they would like to hear from in connection with their investigation.

If you recognise either man, contact police on 101 or call Crimestoppers anonymously on 0800 555111"
Now THAT is a homophobic attack, which was not provoked!
The pictures of the two men are below....
Now do you see the difference?
The top video is where you can easily tell that other than abit of an argument / heated debate, nothing much happend. It could have been easily avoided, but hey-ho, when's the last time you saw a drama queen walk away while the drama gettin' is good?
The story and pictures are of an actual homophobic attack, which couldn't have been walked away from, it wasn't a debate or an argument, it was an actual attack.
It's thing's like this which do make me angry about the LGBT community because the genuine attacks and the attackers stories, get over shaddowed by abit of drama where nothing much happend. But people get sucked into it on social media because it craves drama.
That is all!